"Then you don't trust even your wife?" I asked.
Sensei looked a little uneasy. He did not answer me directly. "I don't trust even myself. If I can't trust myself, then how can I trust another? I'm cursed by my own soul."
"You're thinking too critically. Who could withstand such scrutiny?"
"No, it's not how I think, it's what I've done. I've been shocked, then later horrified, by my own actions."
I wanted to pursue this further, but Sensei's wife called out to him from the next room. He asked what it was, and she replied that she needed him for a moment. He went to her, and what transpired I cannot say. I had little time to wonder, as he quickly returned to the parlor.
"At any rate, you mustn't place your faith in me. You'll only regret it. You'll come to feel deluded and retaliate most callously."
"I'm not sure what you're implying."
"The thought that you once admired a man will drive you later to tear him down. To preclude your future disdain, I wish to forgo your present admiration. I prefer my current loneliness to a future that's lonelier still. For this modern age, with its personal freedoms, independent thought, and egotistical pursuits, loneliness is the price we pay."
Faced with such resignation from Sensei, I could offer no response.