I am a Cat (Chapter 2 b) Section 042 Study Guide


Practice text with full furigana

孔雀くじゃくの料理史りょうりしをかくくらいなら、そんなに多忙たぼうでもなさそうだと不平ふへいをこぼす。

「とにかく近頃ちかごろの如ごとく御馳走ごちそうの食たべ続づつけにては、さすがの小生しょうせいも遠とおからぬうちに大兄たいけいの如く胃弱いじゃくと相成あいなるは必定ひつじょう……」

大兄のごとくは余計よけいだ。何なにも僕ぼくを胃弱の標準ひょうじゅんにしなくても済すむと主人しゅじんはつぶやいた。

「歴史家れきしかの説せつによれば羅馬ローマ人じんは日ひに二度にど三度さんども宴会えんかいを開ひらき候由そろよし。日に二度も三度も方丈ほうじょうの食饌しょくせんに就つき候そろえば如何いかなる健胃けんいの人ひとにても消化しょうか機能きのうに不調ふちょうを醸かもすべく、従したがって自然しぜんは大兄の如く……」

また大兄のごとくか、失敬しっけいな。

「然しかるに贅沢ぜいたくと衛生えいせいとを両立りょうりつせしめんと研究けんきゅうを尽つくしたる彼等かれらは不相当ふそうとうに多量たりょうの滋味じみを貪むさぼると同時どうじに胃腸いちょうを常態じょうたいに保持ほちするの必要ひつじょうを認みとめ、ここに一いちの秘法ひほうを案出あんしゅつ致いたし候そろ……」

はてねと主人は急きゅうに熱心ねっしんになる。

「彼等は食後しょくご必かならず入浴にゅうよく致候いたしそろ。入浴後一種いっしゅの方法ほうほうによりて浴前よくぜんに嚥下えんかせるものを悉ことごとく嘔吐おうとし、胃内いないを掃除そうじ致いたし候そろ。胃内廓清かくせいの功こうを奏そうしたる後のち又また食卓しょくたくに就き、飽あく迄まで珍味ちんみを風好ふうこうし、風好ふうこうし了おわれば又湯ゆに入いりて之これを吐出としゅつ致候いたしそろ。かくの如くすれば好物こうぶつは貪むさぼり次第しだい貪むさぼり候そうろうも毫ごうも内臓ないぞうの諸しょ機関きかんに障害しょうがいを生しょうぜず、一挙両得いっきょりょうとくとは此等これらの事ことを可申もうすべきかと愚考ぐこう致候いたしそろ……」

なるほど一挙両得に相違そういない。主人は羨うらやましそうな顔かおをする。

「廿世紀にじゅっせいきの今日こんにち交通こうつうの頻繁ひんぱん、宴会の増加ぞうかは申す迄もなく、軍国ぐんこく多事たじ征露せいろの第二年だいにねんとも相成候あいなり候そろ折柄おりから、吾人ごじん戦勝国せんしょうこくの国民こくみんは、是非共ぜひとも羅馬人に傚ならって此この入浴嘔吐の術じゅつを研究せざるべからざる機会きかいに到着とうちゃく致いたし候そろ事と自信じしん致候いたしそろ。左さもなくば切角せっかくの大国民だいこくみんも近ちかき将来しょうらいに於おいて悉く大兄の如く胃病いびょう患者かんじゃと相成る事と窃ひそかに心痛しんつう罷まかりあり候そろ……」

Rough translation

"If he has time to write a treatise on peacock cuisine, how busy can he be?" The master expresses some annoyance.

"At any rate, given my current succession of indulgences, it's all but inevitable that I'll soon enough be dyspeptic like yourself. ..."

"He could leave me out of it. Since when am I the poster child for dyspepsia?" The master mutters his objection.

"According to historians, The Romans feasted two to three times daily. Sitting down to gorge oneself, multiple times per day, is bound to take its toll, even on the strongest of stomachs. Accordingly, in due course they would end up like yourself. ..."

"There he goes with 'like yourself' again. Insolent rogue!"

"However, they left no stone unturned in their efforts to reconcile their extravagance and their health. Aware of the need to maintain digestive normalcy while still indulging their great cravings, they hit upon a secret method. ..."

"Well now." The master's interest is suddenly piqued.

"After eating, they made it their habit to bathe. And after bathing, through a certain process, they would purge up all that they'd eaten before, emptying out their stomachs. After thus having cleansed their stomachs, they were ready to feast again. They partook of delicacies to their hearts' content, and after having partaken, again they bathed and purged. Thus repeating, they could indulge their cravings to no end, without ill-treating their digestive organs. If this is not 'two birds with one stone' then I can't think what is. ..."

"It's certainly that. Two birds with one stone." The master's expression betrays a tinge of envy.

"Here in this twentieth century, where endless associations and frequent banquets are the norm, and where we now enter a second year of aggression vis-à-vis Russia and prepare to emerge a victorious nation, we'd do well to learn from the Romans. We're at the juncture, I believe with utmost conviction, where we must learn anew this technique of bathing and purging. If we don't, then I worry greatly that we'll have elevated ourselves only to become, in short order, a nation of dyspeptics like yourself. ..."

Vocabulary

孔雀くじゃく peafowl (peacock or peahen)料理史りょうりし culinary history多忙たぼう terribly busy不平ふへい irritation; annoyance 近頃ちかごろ recently; of lateの如ごとく like ...; as ...御馳走ごちそう feast; delicacies食たべ続づつけ eating in succession小生しょうせい I; me (humble)遠とおからぬうちに in the not too distant future; before long大兄たいけい you (respectful)胃弱いじゃく dyspepsia; weak digestion相成あいなる become必定ひつじょう inevitable; certain 余計よけい superfluous; uncalled-for何なにも in (no) way僕ぼく I; me標準ひょうじゅん standard; norm; measuring stick済すむ make do; get by主人しゅじん master 歴史家れきしか historians説せつ opinion; view羅馬ローマ人じん Romans日ひに in a day; in one day二度にど三度さんど two or three times宴会えんかい banquet開ひらき候由そろよし are said to have held方丈ほうじょう square of one jō per side (3x3 meters; 10x10 feet)食饌しょくせん food laid out on a table就つき候そろえば take a seat at如何いかなる any kind of; whatever kind of健胃けんい strong stomach人ひと person消化しょうか機能きのう digestive function不調ふちょう irregularity; disorder醸かもす bring about; give rise to従したがって consequently; accordingly自然しぜん naturally; in due course 失敬しっけいな rudeness; insolence 然しかるに however; still贅沢ぜいたく extravagance; indulgence衛生えいせい (preservation of) health両立りょうりつせしめん reconcile; achieve simultaneously (せしめん = しようとする)研究けんきゅう study; investigation尽つくしたる pursue to exhaustion彼等かれら they; them不相当ふそうとうに inappropriately; excessively多量たりょう large quantity滋味じみ savoriness; rich food貪むさぼる covet; craveと同時どうじに at the same time as胃腸いちょう stomach and intestines; digestive organs常態じょうたい normal state; normality保持ほちする preserve; maintain必要ひつじょう necessity; need認みとめ recognize; acknowledge一いちの one; a certain秘法ひほう secret method; secret formula案出あんしゅつ致いたし候そろ work out; devise はてね well now急きゅうに suddenly熱心ねっしん eager; engaged; enthusiastic 食後しょくご after eating; after a meal必かならず invariably; without fail入浴にゅうよく致候いたしそろ bathe一種いっしゅの a certain kind of方法ほうほう method; process浴前よくぜん before bathing嚥下えんかせる swallow悉ことごとく altogether; entirely嘔吐おうとし vomit; retch; purge (out)胃内いない inside of the stomach掃除そうじ致いたし候そろ clean廓清かくせい purification; cleaning up; purging功こう service; labor; deed奏そうしたる complete; accomplish後のち after又また again; once again食卓しょくたく dining table飽あく be satisfied; be satiated迄まで until珍味ちんみ delicacies風好ふうこうし enjoy; relish in風好ふうこうし了おわれば having enjoyed; having relished in湯ゆ hot water; hot bath入いりて enter; get into之これ this; these things吐出としゅつ致候いたしそろ disgorge; expel好物こうぶつ favorite foods貪むさぼり covet; crave次第しだい in accordance with貪むさぼり候そうろう covet; crave (そうろう = そろ = ます)毫ごうも (not) in the least内臓ないぞう internal organs; intestines諸しょ various機関きかん machinery; mechanisms; faculties障害しょうがい hindrance; impairment生しょうぜず not gather; not cultivate一挙両得いっきょりょうとく killing two birds with one stone; serving two ends此等これらの these (kinds of)事こと acts; actions; things可申もうすべき must refer to愚考ぐこう致候いたしそろ think; believe; imagine (humble form) に相違そういない no doubt it's ...羨うらやましそうな envious顔かお face; (facial) expression 廿世紀にじゅっせいき twentieth century今日こんにち nowadays; these days交通こうつう association; fellowship頻繁ひんぱん frequent; incessant増加ぞうか increase; growth (in)軍国ぐんこく nation at war多事たじ eventful (times)征露せいろ aggression vis-à-vis Russia第二年だいにねん second year相成候あいなり候そろ become; come to折柄おりから at the time of吾人ごじん we戦勝国せんしょうこく victorious nation国民こくみん people; citizens (of a country)是非共ぜひとも by all meansに傚ならって following; emulating此この this術じゅつ art; technique機会きかい chance; opportunity到着とうちゃく致いたし候そろ arrive at自信じしん致候いたしそろ believe; be convinced左さもなくば otherwise切角せっかくの having striven to become ...大国民だいこくみん citizens of a great nation近ちかき将来しょうらい the near futureに於おいて in; at; regarding胃病いびょう stomach ailment; digestive disorder患者かんじゃ sufferers of; afflicted ones窃ひそかに privately; inwardly心痛しんつう罷まかりあり候そろ worry for; fret over (humble form)